Let us be honest. You have probably spent more time planning what colour of lace to order than planning your financial future.
It is a Saturday morning and your phone buzzes. Aunty Ngozi’s daughter’s wedding invitation just landed. Coral and gold, N65,000 per yard, two yards minimum, plus gele, shoes and a makeup artist who does not take less than N60,000. You send the money without a second thought. This is family.
Then comes the pre-event shoot, the Airbnb, the accessories and the videographer. The reel goes up, gets 150 likes and your account takes a quiet but significant hit.
On the big day, the jollof is smoky, the energy is high and somewhere between the music and the dance floor, N100,000 disappears in N200 and N500 notes before you even realise it.
Multiply that by five weddings, one burial and two birthday celebrations and you have spent over N2,500,000 on events while your savings sit untouched and your financial future stays unplanned.
Nobody is asking you to stop showing up. Nigerians are generous people and that is a beautiful thing. The point is simply this: showing up for others should never consistently come at the cost of showing up for yourself.
Take Chidi, 29, earning N200,000 monthly. Dependable, generous and present at every event, yet borrowing by the third week of every month. Not because he earns too little, but because his money is committed to social obligations before he ever decides where it should go. His social life looks full. His financial life is hollow.
Financial experts recommend spending no more than 5% of your monthly income on social expenses. Everything, including aso-ebi, spraying money and transport, comes out of that. Once it is gone, it is gone. The goal is not to be stingy. The goal is to be intentional, because intention is what separates people who look wealthy at parties from people who are actually building wealth quietly.
Before you send the next payment, ask yourself three honest questions. Do you have at least three months of expenses saved? Are you investing regularly? Do you have a plan for your money beyond this month?
If the answer to any of those is no, the lace can wait.
Your future self will not remember the coral and gold outfit. They will live with every financial decision you make today. Give them something better than a wardrobe full of aso-ebi and an empty savings account.
Celebrate your people. Invest in yourself first.
